FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS

COACHING

I’m already over busy; how am I supposed to add coaching to my schedule?
A: Great question! One of the hardest things I ask new clients is to give up one thing for the initial months of coaching. Typically I hear: “Well, I could sleep less.” Only if someone is sleeping 10 hours a day without a medical problem, does this become a viable option. More typically, we look for something that can be temporarily set aside. It could be reading fun novels, limiting TV watching or cutting back gym works if these are more than 3-4 days a week. The truth is that change takes time and attention. If you seriously desire change, it isn’t just about finding money in the budget – it is about re-budgeting time. We all get the same 24 hours to manage our lives.

Who have you worked with in the past?
A: My clients have included:

• Therapists, social workers, and counselors
• Priests and ministers
• Business owners, senior managers and executives
• Executive and personal coaches
• Yoga teachers
• Individuals experiencing grief or trauma

• Employer supported programs – many employers today recognize the challenges faces by busy employees. When taking on new assignments or in the midst of specific leadership training, often coaching is made available to those who are interested. At other times, employers may require or “strongly suggest” that an individual seek coaching as a means of overcoming habitual patterns that may hold the employee back from advancement.
• Often a person is good beginning a new practice, but find themselves starting over again and again. Examples: learning to managing up the chain of command, dieting, managing technical staff members.
• As life continues to change at increasing rates, priorities easily get scrambled making it difficult to stay the course.
• Repeatedly making the same errors in choice – when we find ourselves going in circles, getting stuck in a rut. AKA insanity: making the same choices thinking we will finally get a different result.
• We may realize we are stuck or be told by others we are stuck.
• We can become depressed, unable to sleep, gaining or losing weight.
• We may find ourselves abusing substances (alcohol, medications, food) or engaging in obsessive behaviors such as over exercising, or sleeping to avoid making changes.
• Relationships that were once going smoothly can change – both personal and work related.
• Accepting defeat without questioning how you can overcome obstacles?

• Manage a demanding job more effectively while maintaining good health.
• Establish better working relationships with superiors, peers or subordinates.
• Identify behaviors that are keeping you stuck and learn how to move through them to more effective interactions.
• Develop or enhance your resilience in times of continuing change.
• Clarify your priorities and stay focused towards specific goals.
• Establish a new life purpose after retirement.
• Manage previously unmanageable emotions such as anger, fear, and depression.
• Broaden your communication skills, such as written and verbal, including public presentations.
• Improve your sense of self-worth and self-esteem.
• Learn how to live a deep rich life while living with a chronic health challenge.
• Refine life after the death of a beloved child or partner.

YOGA

How can I do yoga when I’m not very flexible?
A: It is a common misnomer that to do yoga one must be flexible. In fact, from a physical aspect, yoga is designed to help us developed overall strength first. From strength, we work towards increased range of motion for which we are so beautifully designed. We are then freed up for increased flexibility. Almost everyone comes to yoga very tight. You’ll feel right at home!

My doctor tells me not to do anything strenuous; is yoga safe?
A: Regardless of your physical condition when beginning anything new, it is recommended you seek input from your primary care provider. Once okayed for yoga, look for a class that meets your needs. For the athlete there are classes that provide the stretching and support for even the most challenging events such as triathlons and extreme mountaineering. For anyone with chronic health conditions, you need to be supported with strong breath guidance, gentle stretching and focused strength building.

I thought yoga was all about sitting on pillows and chanting?
A: There are some aspects of yoga that include meditation and chanting. The Hatha yoga classes that I teach are traditional 90 minute classes with breath exercises, stretches, standing poses, strength building flows and ending in a resting pose known as “savasana”. Chanting comes and goes – always a class favorite!

Does yoga conflict with my religious practices?
A: Yoga is not a religion. It is a philosophy that includes good treatment towards self and others adding the physical aspects of stretching and strength building.

BEREAVEMENT

Are you a bereavement counselor?
A: No, I am a bereaved parent who is active in supporting other bereaved parents. I do this through my involvement with our local The Compassionate Friends chapter and as a Regional coordinator for Maryland and Delaware. I am also writing a book in support of other parents whose children died as my son, Jim, did. When needed, I help individuals find a qualified bereavement counselor.

Death is such a distasteful subject. Why do you include it in your work?
A: Because death is so often ignored, buried so to speak, I find it an important topic. We are surrounded by grief – if not in our own families – the news reminds us daily that death is an integral part of life. Yet we press it back using powerful means of denial and therefore miss out on living life to its fullest. It is often said, “keep death close to experience life to its fullest” and I believe this, too.

GENERAL